Solutionless

“Your mom hasn’t partied in years. This party ended ~ decade ago. She doesn’t have a problem with drinking and men. She has a solution called drinking and men. Your mom is not ok inside. And so when she went to rehab before and all we did was take away what she was using to get ok inside the booze and the men you had a solutionless woman standing there. It’s like holding her breath for seventy days… of course you drank… If you are going to set down the booze and the men and become the woman that we believe you capable of being; we have to find an alternative way of you becoming ok inside.” Ben Levenson of Origins™ Recovery Centers

This is one of the most profound things I have ever heard. Don’t we all just want to silence our inner demons and be ok? This quote is from Party Mom an episode of Dr. Phil last week. (Party Mom 3/5/2014) The basic premise of the show is a grown woman has spent her children’s childhoods in a bar and not with them. She has left them scattered; speaking more fondly of the people in the bar than of them. She’s left them to fend for themselves and each other. Three have been in trouble in the law; one was pregnant at twelve. The oldest two are quite frankly done with their mother and are fighting to keep their family somewhat intact.

The realization of what it means to be solutionless and the imagery of a person with no coping skills will haunt me for days to come. I shudder as I wonder how many times we as the church have unintentionally left desperate hurting people solutionless. You want Jesus? Great?! Here’s the list of do’s and don’ts shape it up or ship it out that’ll be 10% please. Even more haunting of a question - have I left people solutionless? Although I am all for personal responsibility and I am seriously into healthy boundaries something I learned the hard way eighteen months ago I am afraid we have been so focused on getting the outer actions of people polished up and shiny we have neglected to pop the hood to see if their engine was dying.

I believe Jesus alone saves the soul. In Acts the jailer asks Paul and Silas what he must do to be saved. Their answer was simple “Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved.” Acts 16:30b-31(NLT)

We need to be the carrier of soul-salve, embodied in the fruit of the Spirit; honesty, kindness, peace, gentleness, and wisdom. We can mentor people while allowing the Holy Spirit to work His inner healing so people are ok on the inside. We can encourage people to change the atmosphere in their homes and lives. Simple things such as setting aside fifteen minutes a day to read words of healing from great introductory books of the Bible such as John, Acts, Psalms, and Proverbs. We teach them to ask the Holy Spirit to reveal Himself to them. Another very simple act is to listen exclusively to Christian music for a while. K-Love suggests thirty days. (I try to do this especially if I am going through a rough patch with my husband. I figure listening to Kenny Chesney You and tequila make me crazy… or The Band Perry’s All I wanna be is done… isn’t going to foster a spirit of staying together. Although these songs can be cathartic one time through if I am listening to a steady diet of being done it doesn’t help me reach my goal of staying together.)

It is by availing ourselves to the voice of the Holy Spirit we see true supernatural healing come. Through His wisdom He trades our solutions of self-destruction for His solutions of inner healing and wholeness.